Excerpt from Masquerade

*Another excerpt from another one of my books, but this one has an excerpt from chapter one and chapter three. I'll let you know when it switches.The excerpt from chapter one is really short, but to somewhat understand what's going on in the excerpt from chapter three, you need that one brief paragraph. oh, and not all of my stories are written from first person, just so you know. oh, aaaand the heroine's name is merianna, but called mer by her friends,JSYK;)*


Smile. Breathe. Don't show what you're really feeling. I step out of the carriage, lifting my dress skirt to avoid tripping. I straighten my shoulders and adjust my mask. A bitter laugh quietly escapes my lips as I think of the irony of the situation: my entire life is one big masquerade, a permanent mask hiding who and what I really am. And here I am at an actual masquerade ball. I sigh, than walk up the steps, automatically smiling again, ready to hide my secret, my past, my real life. Or what it was.

(Chapter three excerpt)

“Remember me, Merianna?” the man asks me. I shake my head, trying to control my breathing, trying to control the panic rising in my chest.
“No,” I whisper. Inside, I’m shouting ‘no’ a thousand times over.
“Come now, Merianna. How could you forget me?” I haven’t forgotten. I wish I had. I remain silent and try to break away, but his strong hands hold me in place. I consider using my…No. I promised myself long ago to never use it again. “Merianna, you cannot hide from your past forever. You knew we would come for you sooner or later,” he whispers in my ear.
“How did you find me?” I ask. Actually, it was more of a squeak. He gave me a meaningful look, and I knew how. It had betrayed me. “Please, let me go. I don’t want this,” I whisper as I try to break away again. He grabs my wrist tightly, and leads me out to the balcony. I consider screaming, but I know that he would expose my true identity to everyone if I did. And that’s the last thing I want.
He turns back to me, his black eyes peering down at me. Another man suddenly steps out of the shadows and I see a pair of familiar gray eyes and gasp.
“Hello, Mer,” he greets with a smile. I shake my head. No, no, no, no, NO! This could not be happening! “Your country needs you, Mer. We are in danger.” I shake my head.
“Let the Royal Family deal with it. Nardom is no longer my problem,” I state, sounding more confident than I feel.
“The Royal Family sent us to find you. Nardom will always be your ‘problem’. You are the country guardian! You cannot turn us down when we most need you!” the black-eyed man exclaims.
“I swore never to kill again!” I return angrily. I feel a hand on my shoulder and look up into those gray eyes that I have missed so much.
“Mer, you are my sister. I know you better than anyone else. And I know that you love Nardom and will not abandon us to this dismal fate,” he says calmly. I sniff, determined not to cry. I haven’t cried since the day I saw the destruction I had caused. I would not cry. I look at the two of them,than sigh. I consider arguing further,but what good would it do?I know I have lost. Even if I refused to return to Nardom, 'it' wouldn't let me. I have only one choice.
“Alright, I’ll go. Meet me tomorrow at the Royal Stables.” They nod, and I can see relief in my brother's eyes. But he knew I would agree when they found me. I was only safe when I was hidden. But I can't hide anymore. No, I'll never be able to hide from who I am again. My brother pats my shoulder, then disappears into the darkness.